Laws of Life

You wouldn’t chuckle at these, if they weren’t so darned true.

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

Murphy’s law – anything that can possibly go wrong, does.

Murphy’s First Corollary – Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
Any attempt on your part to correct this will only accelerate the process.

Murphy’s Second Corollary- It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

The Peter Principal – In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.

Murphy’s Constant – Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.

Quantised Revision of Murphy’s Law – Everything goes wrong all at once. See: When it rains it pours.

Finagle’s Law – Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it will only make things worse.

Gumperson’s Law – The probability of anything happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.

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Let’s take a look at a few examples:

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

-Once a compter program or app is learned, the company who developed it will change it, making it unintelligible requiring a huge learning curve beyond normal human patience or time allotments to figure it out

-In the middle of the night–The sleepier you are the more likely your husband has left the toilet seat up

-the pot on the stove boils quicker when the phone rings

-frosted cakes only crack, earthquake style, when baked for a special occasion

-meeting an old boyfriend in the market guarantees you did not have time for makeup that morning

-your dog barks at a passerby exactly when the pivotal line of dialog disclosing who done it is uttered on your favorite TV show.

-The slice of bread lands buttered side down and in direct proportion to the value of the flooring.

-pears have exactly a thirty second period of ripeness, going from rock hard tasteless to grain mush in that span

-the sensor on your garage door pops it open after you have rounded the corner, out of sight of it

-the gas tank needle flirts with empty in direct proportion to how late you are for an appointment

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

-no police within miles when a guy cuts you off. One on every corner when you don’t need them

-no time to spare to make your flight? Slow TSA queue guaranteed.

-you make that half court shot only when practicing hoops–alone

-forgot your reading glasses? The new restaurant you are trying out is sure to have flickering candlelight only.

-New white jeans assure leaky soda cup, sloppy drip of mustard from hotdog and/or spaghetti that refuses to stay on the plate.

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

-That car in front of you with the never-ending left turn indicator will make their eventual lane change just as you are trying to pass them

-On a crowded sidewalk filled with bustling pedestrians. The one that decides to stop dead in his tracks to look at his phone is sure to be right in front of you.

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Come play along.

What instance of Murphy’s law meets the Peter Principle meets any number of other ‘laws’ bugs you the most?

Examples…. DO SHARE!

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